Maybe it's because I'm german. Maybe it's because I'm a little insane. Maybe it's because my dad is the same way. I don't know. But I need rules and order. I just do. As it happens there are WAY too many situations in everyday life that don't come with rules or clear instuctions and I HATE that.
I hate not knowing what I'm supposed to do because I'm rubbish at guessing. Normally I end up making the wrong choice and then I end up thinking about what I should have done. Or I start worrying that there is no right choice. Somehow that never makes me feel any better.
Also, I've completely given up on this whole "follow your gut" thing because, to be frank, my gut is an idiot. Without exception, everytime I've ever followed what my gut was telling me I ended up in deeper shit than I was to begin with. In fact, I'm starting to think that my gut hates me and is doing it on purpose. Bastard.
*sigh* Life is way too hard. Can I just get the instruction book now? Please?