Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Killing Time

I know I haven't posted in a few days and I feel bad about it. But on the other hand, I had a really incredibly shitty day yesterday and today I'm not feeling much better. So I'm not really interested in writing a whole bunch or being creative or funny or witty. In fact, I would just as soon go back to bed. Maybe a hug would be nice.
However, I will do a little meme just to kill some time.

iTunes

How many songs total: 438
How many hours or days of music: 1.6 Days

Sort by song title
First Song: Feist "1234"
Last Song: Voltaire "Zombie Prostitute"

Sort by time
Shortest Song: Marilyn Manson "Dancing with the One Legged" (00:46)
Longest Song: Weird Al "Trapped in the drive-thru" (10:51)

Sort by album
First album: Cloud Cult "Advice from the happy hippopotamus"
Last album: Wolfmother "Wolfmother"

First song that comes up on Shuffle: Robert Crumb "Mysterious Mose"

Search the following and state how many songs come up
Death - 5
Life - 3
Love - 21
Hate - 1
You - 58
Sex - 3

Friday, January 23, 2009

What Do You Mean "There Aren't Any Rules"!?

Maybe it's because I'm german. Maybe it's because I'm a little insane. Maybe it's because my dad is the same way. I don't know. But I need rules and order. I just do. As it happens there are WAY too many situations in everyday life that don't come with rules or clear instuctions and I HATE that.
I hate not knowing what I'm supposed to do because I'm rubbish at guessing. Normally I end up making the wrong choice and then I end up thinking about what I should have done. Or I start worrying that there is no right choice. Somehow that never makes me feel any better.
Also, I've completely given up on this whole "follow your gut" thing because, to be frank, my gut is an idiot. Without exception, everytime I've ever followed what my gut was telling me I ended up in deeper shit than I was to begin with. In fact, I'm starting to think that my gut hates me and is doing it on purpose. Bastard.
*sigh* Life is way too hard. Can I just get the instruction book now? Please?

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Was It Something I Said?

And if so, can you be specific? I say a lot of things.
Is it just me or does it seem really quiet around here? Is anyone reading this? Does anyone care? Hello? Hello!? HELLO!?

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

I Never Thought That Would Happen

I'm 24, just for the record. That's five presidents and four inaugurations I've lived through. Honestly, I have such a complete lack of interest in all things political and even more so in american politics I had to look that up. I couldn't have named any one of those men beyond Clinton and Bush and I probably couldn't have put them in chronological order. And I have never watched an inauguration, ever.
Today that changed.
I sat and watched the whole thing. I listened to the swearing in and the speeches. Everything. For the first time in my whole life I had a reason to.
The last eight years have been a constant reminder of just how much everything that goes on next door impacts us. It's dragged us down in more ways than I care to count, pulled us in to conflicts and been a weight on the shoulders of all of us. It's something I had never really felt before. So it would be a lie to say that my hopes aren't high, but it would be a bigger lie to say that my concern isn't higher.
But for now I'm going to concentrate on being hopeful. Hang on to the good feeling while I can, you know?



**On a completely unrelated note, let me take a second and say sorry for missing both MLK day AND Edgar Allan Poe's birthday. I spent all day yesterday being really, really, really sick and wasn't in any condition to do much of anything, including posting.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Watch As The Amazing Gwenhwyfar Fearlessly Answers Questions!

A while back Robin did the 5 questions meme and now it's my turn. Here are Robin's questions and my completely and very serious answers. They are, after all, questions of great social importance.

1. Verbal Kint, Dr. Cox or Me?
Oh geez... I have to choose? What's up with that? Can't I have my cake and eat it too (which is a stupid saying BTW, if it's my cake, why shouldn't I eat it?)? I have good reasons for choosing any one of you.
Verbal is, well, Verbal. Do I need another reason? He's Kevin at his most loveable. Even knowing that he's really a terrifying criminal mastermind, you still can't help but love him.
Dr. Cox is the kind of guy I'm usually drawn to. Loud, angry and given to ranting with the added bonus of being smart (smarts are super sexy). That and John C. McGinley is seriously hot.
Robin is just so... Robin. She has the wonder twins and the furkids and Manly Man (a definite bonus). Then, just to complete this already impossibly perfect package, she loves Kevin too.
See? How am I supposed to chose?

2. If you had 5 minutes with Kevin Spacey but could only ask him one question, what would it be?
Your place or mine?

3. What movie were you most surprised to find out you liked?
I'd probably have to go with Zoolander. I know most of you just groaned. I know isn't a totally lame movie. It's a guilty pleasure, what can I say? It makes me laugh in a totally "I don't have to think about this at all"/"I just want to watch something stupid and mindless" kind of way. But it was one of those movies I had decided I was going to hate and by the time the credits rolled I was sitting there going "So help me god, I actually liked it."

4. If you could live in any tv show which one would it be and why?
Star Trek (TNG). Hands down. How could I pick anything else? Food processors, transporters, most diseases eliminated, holodeck, alien planets, Picard, Data, Riker, Q and the list goes on. There's almost nothing that I don't love about it and way too much cool shit to pass up.

5. What is the first movie you remember?
Remember seeing? That's really hard because I have a serious problem trying to put event in chronological order.
At home I would probably say The Secret of Nimh or Donald in Mathmagic Land (yes, I still have a copy of both).
In the theatre, I clearly remember going to see The Little Mermaid with my mom, aunt and cousin (for some reason I'm sure my grandma was there too).

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Death Of Khan


I was really hoping that this year would, at very least, start off better than last year. But no. Here I am writing yet another fairwell to one of my favourite people.
Ricardo Montalban passed away this morning. Taking with him one of the all time greatest voices, ever. No one else could have been Khan or Mr. Roarke or could have made the phrase "fine corinthian leather" so damned sexy. Really, there have been few people who could make anything sound so damned sexy.



Quick Update

I could write a whole post, but I'm being lazy. Maybe I'll write one later. For now you get bullet points. Enjoy.

- It's supposed to drop down to something like -40 today. Isn't that lovely? It snowed for two days and now it's -40.

- My new job is making me insane, so the job hunt continues.

- The guy who is the head of my section is an idiot. In the last week I've had to explain nearly everything I've said over again to him because he doesn't get it. I've also shown him how to add bullet points to a word doc and attach a file to an email (twice). I think I may have to hit him.

- I'm still plotting the doom of my mailman. That asshole is walking on awfully thin ice at this point.

- The PS3 is still going strong. I think I may have to name it.

So, what've you all been up to? I feel like we never just talk anymore.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Happy Birthday, Janna!!!


Since it's your birthday I got you this super awesome Trek cake! I know, I know, I shouldn't have. But I couldn't resist.
Hope it's a good one lady. You deserve it.

Friday, January 09, 2009

More Adventures In Gwenland

The egg-deviling went well I think. The dark spirits were summoned nicely and despite a few of them bickering back and forth it was all ready to go by 10pm. I've also learned yet another lesson about how stupidly easy it is to impress most people, especially at a potluck.
I've always been the kind of person who worries that if I half-ass it, everyone else will go all out and I'll end up looking like a chump. So I make myself crazy trying to pull something amazing together, because I'll be damned if I'm going to let anyone out cook me... bastards. Then I turn up with my creation, which I lovingly hand-crafted and spent hours fretting over, only to find that everyone else half-assed it or bought something at Safeway.
Deviled eggs have taught me a few valuable potluck lessons.

1. They are just enough work that most people wouldn't have made them (because as we've learned, they are lazy bastards who are trying to make me insane) but easy enough that I put them together in about 15 minutes.
2. Doing even the simplest piping job with the filling (I put the filling in a zip-lock and cut off a corner) impresses the shit out of most people.
3. Everyone seems to love them, which is both confusing and great.

I think I'm starting to see why they have long been a potluck standard and a favourite of the leave it to beaver/father knows best type of 50s mom crowd.
Now all I have to do is find a way to make the recipe something jusut a little different so I can claim it. That way I'll never have to make anything else for a potluck ever again.
On a completely unrelated note, sweet jesus... am I really that old? *sigh*

Monday, January 05, 2009

Chicken Little Meets The Exorcist

I got myself another job. For now. I'm not exactly sure about the whole thing and it's only temporary until the end of March. But what the hell, right? Could be worse and they pay me money, which is nice.
Anyway, we've got this training day/potluck/gift exchange tomorrow. I'm not really sure how to feel about that since I've only been here three days. I mean, I've only just managed to learn four names (that leaves me about thirty short) and I'm already getting hit up for presents and food. I suppose I be getting some back, but I'm broke and lazy. You know how it is.
So I spent a while looking around for something to make for tomorrow. I could certainly just buy something but I don't want to look like some lame-ass who can't cook to save her life. Especially because I CAN cook and quite well too. The trick is to find something that is tasty, cheep to make and easy enough that I won't be up until four in the fucking moring making it and cursing whoever devised the evil potluck bullshit in the first place.
I think I've hit on a solution. One I'd never really thought of before. But lately I've been on this nostalgia kick. I really love vintage stuff, especially old cookbooks. Even more so the ones that contain recipes and pictures that are just a little terrifying. But that's me. I figure, tho, it's probably best not to show up with something too scary. So I compromised.
Deviled Eggs.
Oddly enough, I've never made them before. Ever. I honestly didn't even know what was in them. Eggs, obviously but beyond that it was a mystery. And after looking up the recipe I realized how simple they are and (best of all) I have everything I need to make them at home.
That being said, in about half an hour, when I get home, I will be starting on my very first journey to deviled-eggdom. If you don't hear from me soon, something when horribly, horribly wrong. And just in case, I'd just like to say I'm sorry I did that thing to you that time, it really was a stupid thing to do and please don't put my dead body in any lewd positions and take pictures.

Saturday, January 03, 2009

Here I Am

I know, you were all worried about me. Right? Right?
Yeah, I thought so.
Well I'm back. I'm not dead. I mean, I'm not quite what you'd call "alive" but then, I never really was. So you know, back to sub-normal. And no, I haven't contracted some rare and exotic new disease they will name after me once I keel over, once and for all sealing my fate as being synonymous with a slow and painful death (which would be eight shades of fuckin' awesome, by the way).
I have however acquired a new addiction. By which I mean I bought a new addiction. It came in the form of a PS3. There was much giddiness and giggling. By which I mean I managed to not kill anyone in EB Games including the fucking skater prick, asshole, douche bag, fucktard who decided that the hundred or so other people crammed in to the approximately thirty square feet of store space were simply not as important as he is and tried to jump in front of me in line WHILE THE SALES GUY WAS HELPING ME. But the happiness (or what I would assume from other peoples descriptions of happiness, that emotion was) of getting my hands on a backwards compatible PS3 AND Little Big Planet (finally!) kept me from dismembering him slowly before a cheering crowd of onlookers who had all become so bitter and jaded by the post-christmas rush to consume as much useless shit because it's on sale** and were tired of self-centered wannabe oppressed minorities (ie. rich white kids with no real brains or purpose for being) acting like they own the whole fucking planet.
I brought my new bundle of joy home and have spent endless hours since sitting on my couch and playing. I've been bouncing between LBP, Tomb Raider: Underworld and God of War II (which I might actually like as much or more than the original). I actually played them so much I was even dreaming the game play in the scant few hours I slept between playing.
Little Big Planet, by the way, is wonderful. I keep trying to come up with an adequate description of the game for people and I'm at a loss for words. It's not really all that hard, but it's fun. I don't know how to make that sound better, but it is. Much. I can't remember the last time I got a new game and I really had fun. I mean, I always enjoy a new game but to just have fun in the most child-like sense of the word. Just to enjoy it for the sake of enjoying it. I'm also enthralled by the details of the game's overall look. It's just so damned... pretty. And unlike a lot of games, it's something I can see myself playing over and over again.
Underworld is also good, but a little buggy which is disappointing. I haven't had any major fuck-ups yet and believe me, you will hear about it if I do. Despite the bugginess it's been lots of fun to play. Overall the look of the game is amazing. Everything is beautiful and who doesn't love watching Lara Croft jump around exotic locals wearing almost nothing? Bouncy, bouncy, right? She even gets all glisteny after she goes for a swim. I can't imagine how these games ever got popular...
Anyway, I'll try and get some pictures of other ill gotten booty or ill booten gotty I got from people I know soon as some of it is rather awesome and other stuff just defies any clear explanation.


**The only reason I went out was because EB informed me they only just had the one backwards compatible PS3 and they could only hold it until the end of the day and I'll be damned if I was going to let it slip through my fingers and in to the hands of some grubby fucknut who just happened to wander in to the store. Crowds be damned, I wanted my fucking Playstation!