Monday, April 23, 2007

Ow.

The night before last I decided I was hungry and I should make some food. Unfortunately I didn't really have anything to eat, so I went to the store. By the time I got home I was getting a headache because I needed something to eat.
Being hungry and lazy I just grabbed the first knife I saw to start cutting up potatoes. It was the one and only steak knife I own. It's a piece of crap and really the worst knife I could have picked to cut baby potatoes with. This was made painfully (very, very painfully) clear when the knife stuck in one of the potatoes (of course it had to be the last one I was cutting up) and I forced the knife through. Apparently I used a little too much force, as the knife sliced through not only the potato, but my finger as well.
It caught my index finger just above the top knuckle and cut through the tip. At first it was oddly numb, so I stuck the wounded appendage in my mouth and headed for the washroom. It wasn't bleeding much, so I ran it under some cold water.
Another bad idea.
This brought the feeling rushing back and started the blood gushing. Since I was
dripping everywhere, I wrapped it in some paper towel. Four to be exact. I bled through them all. After a few minutes of cursing and bleeding I managed to wrap my finger in several band-aids. I spent the rest of the night in pain and cursing every steak knife ever made. I also decided that I didn't need to go to the hospital.
Yesterday I changed the band-aid at my mother's suggestion. It was a pretty bad
idea, in that it started my finger bleeding again, me cursing and my finger hurting. But it did give me a chance to get a better look at it.
Without the gushing blood I could see that my previous asessment was incorrect. I really should have gotten stitches. It was also obvious why my fingernail had hurt so damned much (I wasn't even aware your fingernails could hurt), the knife cut right through to the underside of my nail.
At this point though, it's way too late to bother going to a doctor. My finger still hurts like a sonofabitch. The potatoes weren't bad, but not worth that much pain. And I think I'm going to throw that damned knife away.

5 comments:

Jason Doan said...

Did you listen to the Penn radio episode from when Penn sliced his thumb open juggling broken bottles and Goudeau tried to fix it with Krazy Glue live on the air?

I was impressed with the lack of swearing.

Gwenhwyfar said...

No, I didn't. But I'm going to have to look for it.
Do you know which one it was?

Jason Doan said...

January 5th - Lay-Surgeon Goudeau

Jason Doan said...

Oh and the blow dryer story from the day before that is all kinds of awesome.

Gwenhwyfar said...

Thanks!