Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Son Of A Bitch! pt. 3: the saga continues

Ever have one of those days where making it through without killing someone is a major accomplishment? Today was one of those days. By the end of it I was ready to strangle everyone within arms reach. Well, with one notable exception - more on that later.
Like I said earlier, it was crazy busy at work. It actually got worse as the day wore on. The holds took forever and the stream of trolleys was pretty much constant. It got to the point that the clerks would flinch and cower in fear every time they had another trolley to bring back.
Then I got to spend the evening with a person who seems to think that having children my age translates into her having seniority at work. Sorry, Sweet heart. I don't fucking think so. Please stop talking to me like I'm a ten year old who need to wear a helmet and rides the special bus to school before I toss you off the mezz. My own mother doesn't even talk to me like that. She knows better. And I know how much "We need to start pick-up" sounds like "Could you start putting away the paperbacks, because we have all fucking night", but I'll try to speak more clearly in future. Sorry for the confusion.
And the patrons. Oh, the patrons. When will beating these people be made legal? Although I have to admit that I'm constantly amazed that people who obviously can't read or count and have the attention span of a three year old on speed still manage to get themselves up, dressed (sort of) and make their way down to the library in the first place.
Nothing warms my heart more than watching someone pulling random things off the shelves and shoving them back in where ever and then having them ask me where a certain item is, because... wait for it... it's not where the computer said it would be. It takes every ounce of will power not to finally snap "Oh, it's not!? Well, some asshole probably decided that our system of organisation didn't work for them and stuck the fucking book on some random shelf somewhere, because as a patron that's their fucking right!"
But to be fair the Dewey Decimal Classification has only been around since 1876 and it does require that you know how to count, you know, to ten. Fuckwit.
As our patrons clearly can't count, I obviously can't expect them to be able to tell time. That's fine. That's why, in addition to our posting of library hours, we also provide a nifty little service. We announce fifteen minutes before closing that you need to start clearing out. Then again ten minutes before closing. And five minutes before. And finally right at closing. Seems simple enough. Not so.
As I'm trying desperately to finish cleaning up for the night, (because everything upstairs should be put away by 9pm and to be honest, I don't get paid for staying late) I encounter two of my very favourite people. Bling Bling and Last Minute Larry. Both are terrible for taking stacks of newspapers, from every conceivable folder and refusing to relinquish them until the very last possible second. Tonight was no exception. I wasn't even going to consider fighting them for their papers. I hit my "fuck it" point, which would have been all well and good had I not looked over just as the announcement that we were closed was made to see some stupid fuck digging through the magazines and taking more out! GAH!
Don't worry. It's okay. We all love to stay after hours and clean up after you. Oh, and we all get paid until you fuck off. We actually all live in the library basement. It's our home, our whole lives in fact. We have no friends and family outside the walls of our beloved library. So please, stay as long as you like. You fucking cock.
Oh and the exception I mentioned. The one person who didn't aggrivate the shit out of me this evening was actually a patron. He must have stumbled in to the library by accident. He was much to intelligent to be one of our patrons. He commented on my having to put things away and that it seemed like less fun activity while I was shelving CDs and I was polite (I don't mind when people are civil to me). He then asked if the CDs were in any actual order. I pointed out that they are in alphabetical order. Or at least they should be. Patrons like to make a mess of our order. He suggested that they were lazy or illiterate, I agreed. He then promised to be very careful and not to make a mess of the CDs and then managed to stay completely out of my way while I was working. I honestly don't care what his reasons for doing so were. I'm just glad that at least one person managed to behave like a civilized human being for once.
Yeah, I know, it's a long ass post that no one but myself is interested in. But it's my blog and I can do what I like. So there.
I had a bad day, leave me alone.

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