3000!

Holy shit!
3000 hits?
Wow.

They Grow Up So Fast, Don't They?

Our lovable, simple, man-child cousin is leaving us in the name of education. G will be heading off to the vast metropolis of Calgary in the next couple of days and shall be missed. So if you're in Calgary and you happen to see this guy wandering around, looking confused, please try and give him good directions. If at all possible write them down, maybe draw a map... Actually if you could just take him to wherever he needs to go, that would be great.
Good luck, Dude. Try not to get lost and come and visit so we can all go for coffee. Me and Steve need someone to annoy the shit out of.

Kitties

Well now that I've got that angry post out of the way (and I feel much better), here's a picture of my kitties. Everybody loves kitties. Everybody!



And for some reason which I cannot even begin to remember, I found this picture in my camera...



If you can't guess (and let's hope you can't), it's a shot of Naiomi's crotch. Why this picture is still in my camera is beyond me. So I share it with you, I'm just that giving.

Magnum Bitch

Dear Magnum Bitch,
That's right, you, the one in the brand new Dodge Magnum. (I know exactly what kind of car you were driving, by the way, but it was hard to not notice as I came awfully close to getting an up close and personal meeting with your shit mobile.) Would it be too much to ask that you pull your head out of your ass just long enough to shoulder check?
Were you looking to add a smear of Suzuki to your lovely new paint job? Have you had too many face lifts to be able to turn your empty little head? Botox eaten away at your ability to reason? Or maybe, just maybe, you are a uselessly stupid bitch who's unaware that swerving into the lane next to you during six o'clock traffic on a fairly busy road without so much as a glance is a really fucking stupid idea!
And by the way, my angrily honking and every single expletive I screamed at you were entirely warranted. You, along with anyone else who almost runs me into the ditch, will get exactly the same response every damned time.
Also, just so you're aware, had I not swerved, I'm fairly certain that your kid would have ended up in my car. Way to go, not only are you a menace to other drivers, but to your own family as well.
One final thing, you're driving a car that is so ugly it should be considered a crime against humanity.

More Crap to Waste Your Time

I found this site earlier today and have been laughing like the juvenile humored being that I am ever since.
Enjoy.

From me to you 15

Just a short one this time.

- Beer and clam is not a Caesar. Seriously, you shmuck.

- Getting make-up tattooed on, just for the hell of it, is a shitty, shitty idea.

- Beer and maple fudge does not go together, ever, trust me.

- A one piece denim outfit should be considered a crime against humanity, along with the speedo and stirrup pants.

It's Raining, It's Pouring...

It's definitely Monday.
I've only been at work an hour and a half and already the phone stopped working, the elevator is broken, two people have called in sick and - here's the real kicker - the upstairs toilet over flowed. And I don't mean a little, I mean water was gushing out of the men's room and down the hall, creating a waterfall down the stairs and come through the ceiling on the first floor.
It wasn't just some "oops the toilet is plugged" kinda thing either. Some ass hat decided it would be fun to plug it on purpose. According to Bill, our head maintenance guy, this makes 3 times recently. He wasn't very happy about it.
So I got to spend the first part of my shift scrambling around like a mad fool trying to get containers under the down pour and moving books out of the way.
Fuck I hate people.
And Mondays.

Talk Nerdy To Me, Baby

Okay, so here's the nerdiest question I think I've ever asked. In fact I think it's the nerdiest thing I've ever pondered.
It's something I've been wondering since I watched two episodes of Star Trek (yes, Star Trek... insert nerd joke here). One in which (the ever annoying) Wesley Crusher falls in to a pool of water on the Holodeck and another where they demonstrate how Holodeck objects cannot exist outside of the Holodeck by throwing a book out the door and watching it disappear.
If things on the Holodeck cannot exist outside of it, then wouldn't it stand to reason that the sopping wet Crusher, stepping off the Holodeck, should have become bone dry again?
There, I've just exposed myself as a nerd.

Seriously Hot

Paul Gross is hot. Smokin hot.
I don't care what you say, Bev.

Pain

Some of the guys may just want to skip this one. I'm not going to apologize either, I'm in pain and way beyond tired so if you don't like it that's just too damned bad.
I'm in pain.
Lots.
I only slept for an hour last night. Actually it was this morning. From 2am to 3am. I spent the rest of my night dying in my sauna/oven/hell hole of a house and doubled over in pain. I had forgotten what it was like to be in enough pain to actually get sick, so the Gods decided to give me a refresher course.
A fist full of the most powerful pain killers I could get my hands on, short of having to hock my stereo and make a deal in a dark alley, and I still hurt everywhere.
suffice it to say, I'm grumpy as hell and in desperate need of a nap, which isn't going to happen unless the temperature goes down and someone brings me some fucking morphine.

Good Luck

I know I've been taking a lot of potshots at celebrities lately, but this one I'm not going to joke about. Mostly because I actually feel bad for the guy.
Apparently Robin Williams entered rehab seeking treatment for alcoholism.
It's a shame really, he'd gone so long without all that shit. It's always terrible when people fall back into addiction.
And I know that I've been making fun of Mel Gibson for doing, essentially, the same damned thing.
The difference?
Robin Williams didn't make the decision after getting caught drinking and driving, fighting with the cops, showing himself as a bigoted, egotistic ass hat and blaming the whole thing on being drunk. That sort of douche baggery gets you made fun of and generally shit on, where as recognizing you have a problem and making a private decision to better yourself gets you understanding and wishes for good luck.

Sleep Tight

I keep finding these articals that are grossing me out. This one in particular bothered me a whole lot. And so I share it with you.

Joy!

I'm so happy I could shit. Hellboy 2 is coming! Squee!
I don't care what any of you jerks think, I loves Hellboy, I loves him good.
Now all I have to do is wait until 2008. It's not gonna be easy.

Worthy of Comment

So Amazon has started selling milk. I know that's not very exciting, but the comments people have left are.
Check it out... seriously.