Thursday, September 20, 2007


I spend a lot of time bitching about women. Women of all things. Women, of which I am one. But let's face it, they are (for the most part) insane, bitchy, manipulative and did I mention insane? They all seem to have this idea that everyone has ESP so they don't actually have to verbally comunicate anything but the most inane rubbish. When they do actually want to communicate something of importance they hint or imply in the most obnoxious roundabout sort of way. And heaven forbid you should just come right out and ask them what the problem is.
You'll almost never get anything beyond "Nothing" or "I'm fine" or "I'm not mad" in that tone that leaves you with no other choice then to believe that they aren't exactly being truthful. Or you might get my personal favourite. "If you don't know what you did, I'm not going to tell you." (Yes, I've gotten that from a girl before. Actually several girls. What, am I your fucking boyfriend now?)
Now let's pause for a second. "If you don't know, I'm not going to tell you."
WHAT!? What the fuck does that even mean? If I don't know and you're not going to tell me, how the fuck am I supposed to work out what the problem is?
They're all fucking lunatics.
That being said, I don't exactly have a lot of praise for men either. Most days I'm just shocked that they manage to dress and feed themselves.
I can't even offer that they say what they mean (which is what I always hear from men "we say what we mean"... BULLSHIT!). I can't count the number of times I've asked a guy what's wrong and gotten "Nothing". Which of couse means "I'm mad at you but I'm not going to tell you why because I like when something little has to be like pulling fucking teeth."
And then to listen to them talk about what they're looking for in a girlfriend. "I just want someone low maintenance. Someone who doesn't mind if I watch the game/hang out with my friends/isn't jealous/etc." Can we just stop with this bullshit already?Or if that is actually what you want, maybe you could go for that instead of dating a girl who is so high maintenance she might as well be a poodle. And if you do like Miss Poodle Princess, could you stop fucking bitching about her?
Goddamnit! What the fuck is wrong with people!?
Can I get a fucking Bullshit-to-English Dictionary over here, please? Because trying to figure out what you assholes are talking about half the time is exhausting.


may-b said...

Sometimes I am so much in awe of you. You're scary!

Gwenhwyfar said...

Awe? Scary? Moi? hahahaha.
(and um... thanks? I think.)